Networking at Conferences for Introverts: The Marketing Introvert Pt. II

Networking at conferences for introverts can be the biggest energy drain. But it’s not impossible.

When I first started going to conferences I thought they were a huge waste of my time and the biggest drain of my energy. But the problem was I was going about conferencing all wrong.

I chose conferences that looked great on social media, but provided little to nothing in the way of helping me either meet new people or grow our business.

I went to conferences that were full of sales pitches in uncomfortable hotel conference rooms that allowed for no energetic space.

I was about to give up.

I thought there was no place for introverts networking conferences.

But then, after years of trying with no results other than money, time, and energy wasted I figured it out.

I needed to go to conferences on my own introverted terms. I needed to find the right conferences for both my energy and business needs.

And then things all fell into place.

I made new friends, I made new connections, and I met business owners who eventually became clients.

What I do isn’t some magic bean solution and it’s not about being more extroverted.

It’s about conferencing on your terms and working with your introversion.

 

Hint: If you don’t know what kind of introvert you are, check out this article.

Consider this my ultimate guide to networking at conferences for introverts.

How to Choose the Best Conference (The Most Important Aspect of Networking at Conferences for Introverts)

The worst mistake anyone can make (extrovert, introvert, or ambivert) is to go into a conference looking to make money from the people there.

First and foremost, we need to pick conferences that will help us level-up in our business first, meet our introverted social needs, and expanding our network is an added bonus.

So first, pick conferences that will help you improve your business.

I’ve been to a lot of conferences, some duds, some game-changing.

Some conferences were too beginner (that’s why it’s important to research into the different types of speakers/breakaways, etc.) and some were all about having an Instagram-worthy time (not my jam at all).

Even if you walk away not having talked to a single person, you should walk away with more than a selfie in front of a floral installation.

Think about what you want to get out of a conference to help you improve your business.

This year I’m scheduled to attend Alt Summit, with a variety of business topics at all levels, and the Level C Brand Strategy Workshop to become a certified Brand Specialist. Nathan and I also plan on attending Adobe Max in the fall so we can learn the latest and greatest from fellow designers and get updates on the Adobe Creative Suite.

So when you’re looking for conferences to attend, the first thing to look at is business growth.

Then Narrow Down Your Options By Considering Your Energy Needs

This is an essential step for introverts networking at conferences.

If you’re a Social Introvert, like me, Alt Summit allows you to create your own schedule over five days, as does Adobe Max. They don’t demand that you be somewhere and stay seated from 8 AM to 6 PM. 

Alt Summit has dance parties and cocktail meetups, but everything is optional. I once went to a conference that had mandatory dancing before each speaker and I wasn’t having it. I felt like such a party pooper, but that just isn’t something I’m going to do unless Mick Jagger himself appears. (BTW- the host of the conference continuously belittled introverts. The conference should have marketed it as a conference for extroverts).

Thinking Introverts will need opportunities to be introspective. While you won’t shy away from being social, it will be important that there is time (or you make time) for activities such as journaling, meditating, or doodling. Activities with mandatory sharing and talking might not be your favorite, depending on your level of Thinking Introversion.

Anxious Introverts will also need quick outs, so something entirely enclosed with a very strict schedule won’t do. While I’m not an anxious introvert, I was once at a conference where the main speaker was also selling us hard on her larger coaching program and would literally tell people to sit down if they were about to walk out during her pitch.

I sure hope none of those people were Anxious Introverts. Needless to say, I was totally put off and didn’t enjoy myself for the rest of the week. I would imagine this would be a huge red flag for all introverts networking at conferences.

Restrained Introverts will need to do things at their own pace. This is me, and that’s another reason why I love Alt Summit. There’s yoga in the morning if I feel like it, I don’t have to be anywhere at any particular time, and I can give myself space to soak in what I’ve learned.

Then Think- Will My People Be There?

If you are looking to expand your network, this does come into consideration.

Would you like to meet people that would be a good match for your service/product/experience?

Do you want to meet people in your field to have others to mastermind or collaborate with?

While I’ve never gone to a conference just to expand my network, it does happen, some more than others.

Not to put any conference on blast, but some are just too wrapped up in the Instagram experience, and those people aren’t my people. So if something has fluffy content and is way too pretty for its own good, it’s not for me.

And then other conferences are full of people in our own industry, like Adobe Max. These are still valuable because you’ll meet people who you can either introduce you to others that might want to either hire you or collaborate with you. And it’s always nice to have people you can talk to about common problems and projects. Don’t discount the power of networking within your industry.

Will You Need a Buddy (Or Should You Fly Solo)?

There are pros and cons to going to a conference with a tried and true business buddy.

When you have someone to go with, you’ll be more at ease. You know you’ll have someone to talk with.

And if your conference buddy is an extroverted connector, they can help introduce you to others.

The trick is that you need to be very clear with anyone you’re attending with that you need space and that you might need to take off on your own for a bit (see Allowing for Space below).

The cons of conference going with someone is that as introverts, we tend to not want to talk to anyone else. Which defeats the whole purpose of going to conferences to meet other people.

I’ve gone to a couple of conferences with other introverts, and wanna know how many connections I made?

Zero!

I stayed in my comfort zone of an introverted-bubble, stuck with my buddies throughout the entire conference, and went home with the same tiny circle of people as I went in with.

But the conferences I go to by myself?

That’s where I meet people. That’s where I get out of my comfort zone and talk to people. That’s where I’ve made connections that turned into friendships and clients.

Even if I share a room with someone (gotta cut them costs) I don’t “go” to the conference with them. We’re roomies and we might go to some of the same workshops or sit together at lunch, but it’s all about getting out there now that I know how powerful meeting new people is.

Now if you’re an Anxious Introvert, my way of conference going might just be too much, so having a buddy to help you feel at ease may be essential. You know yourself best.

The cons of flying solo are that you do need to put yourself out there and talk to people. But if you have Thinking Introvert tendencies (like I do) you’ll go in with the mindset that other’s opinions of you aren’t as important as your own opinions of yourself. 

So if we don’t hit it off with others, that’s okay. We’re not for everyone. But we are for some people, and those people will love us!

Get Prepared Early (And Save Yourself from Stress)

Does the conference require travel?

Get your plane tickets and hotel room booked ASAP.

While I’m not an Anxious Introvert, I am an anxious traveler. Let’s be real- I’m a bumbling-idiot traveler.

When I’m flying anywhere I’m typically by myself so there are two things I always need- a window seat and a comfortable hotel very close to the venue.

I need to cuddle up next to that window (my years as a teacher have helped with not needing to use that gross airplane bathroom) and I need a hotel that I can relax in while also being walking distance from the conference space.

As a Restrained Introvert, it’s difficult that most conferences have a strict schedule and I have to be there by a certain time since I prefer mornings that are on the slower side. So I cut the drive time and make sure I can walk to the conference within five minutes. My hotel in Philadelphia for the Level C workshop is a two minute walk. Yes, it’s more expensive to stay in a downtown hotel and not a motel on the outskirts, but my energy is more important. And I’ll need all the energy I can get with two full days of talking with others.

Know your comfort and energy needs, and plan any travel around them.

Do You Need to Buy Anything In Advance?

If you’re traveling, what’s the weather? Will you need appropriate shoes or an umbrella?

I live in Southern California, so I don’t have appropriate shoes for 80% of the country. And the only reason I own an umbrella is for travel.

But also think about any supplies you’ll need, both business and personal.

Are you running low on makeup? Do any prescriptions need filling in advance? Do you need a notepad or a new phone charger?

Get these items ordered ASAP and your energy won’t get drained the day of because you left everything to the last minute.

Do You Need to Create Your Schedule?

Being prepared is all about conserving your energy as much as possible. So if a conference has multiple workshops, multiple lunch offerings, and multiple activities over multiple days and the thought of all of that stresses you out (it sure does for me), you might consider planning out your schedule beforehand.

For me, given that I need to schedule plenty of downtime and slow mornings to conserve energy, having a plan in place makes me feel more confident.

But if you’re more of a free-spirit and love to spontaneously go to whatever options suit your current mood- allow for flexibility. Also- I’d love to meet you so you can help me loosen up a bit!

Dressing On-Brand (It’s More Important Than You Think)

I discovered this tip by accident.

I always dress “on brand,” which is a little different than the everyday conference-goer attire.

And you know what- people would start talking to me about my clothes. I soon realized that that was the easiest way to get people to talk to me, because I am so bad at striking up conversations with others.

If you’re amongst the Thinking Introverts who like to express their quirkiness, the easiest way to do it is with your clothing.

Not only will you most likely get compliments which can lead into an easy conversation, but your people will notice you. I was once wearing a Ziggy Stardust sweater at a conference and someone said she started talking to me because of my sweater. Note to self- buy all the David Bowie attire.

So easy and often overlooked.

Know How to Introduce Yourself (By Not Making it About Yourself)

This just isn’t a networking at conferences for introverts tip. This is a networking at conferences for everyone tip.

Whenever someone asks us what we do, the first thing we say is exactly that.

I’m a brand designer.

It’s boring and won’t make people care about what we do and leads to the next obvious string of questions.

Where are you from? Do you have any kids (my least favorite question of all time ever)?

We need to spark interest and keep the conversation rolling.

That’s why I use a casual form of the StoryBrand One-Liner (which you can create for yourself with this blog post).

You start with the problem your customers have, how you fix it, and end with the success your clients have.

Officially our one-liner sounds something like, “After a few years, many lifestyle and hospitality brands feel like there’s a disconnect between the brand they have and the brand they want, so we designed a suite of strategy and identity design services to create brands you and your customers will love.”

It changes every now and then, but it’s way too formal and salesy to say word for word. Don’t make it sound rehearsed.

Honestly, I normally don’t say the whole thing. It’s just too much.

I’ve played around with just the success part. Sometimes I’ll say “I build brands customers will love.” Sometimes I say “I build brands that look like money and get money-making results.”

Yes, I’m still making it all about the success of our clients without getting into exactly what we do, where we’re located, and how long we’ve been in business.

And it works- trust me. At Alt Summit I ran out of business cards. But more on that later.

Side Note: I’m constantly playing around with different ways to introduce myself. I’m toying with the idea of saying I’m a brand detective. I’ll let you know how it goes.

Easy Ways to Meet New People (Even for Introverts)

One Word: Lunch.

The easiest way to talk with people and really network at conferences as an introvert is during lunch.

I actually met our largest client in a lunchline at Alt Summit.

And people at conferences are always willing to share their table with others.

Even if you aren’t great at introducing yourself, if you listen and are nice, people will talk to you (except maybe at some of those Instagramable conferences- you might not be cool enough. I know I wasn’t).

You can also listen for hot button topics (topics people are really passionate about) and ask people to tell you more. People love good listeners, and introverts tend to be great listeners as long as our energy is up.

Meetups

Many conferences also have meetups for like-minded people, so it’s easy to mix and mingle as long as you know you’re all there to talk about a common purpose. I’m going to a wine-lovers meetup at Alt Summit- I’m sure the conversation will eventually move away from wine, but wine’s a great place to start.

Right Before A Speaker Talks

People at conferences tend to be in the zone when they’re ready to learn from a presenter, but it’s always nice to say hi to the people you’re sitting next to. Throw them a genuine comment if one comes to mind (don’t force it) and if you notice something about them that you connect with, mention it. If anyone ever has Murderino merch on their person, I will talk to them and ask what their favorite true crime is. Because those are my people!

I also once sat next to a woman that sold Mid Century textiles and was writing a book on the topic. Instant connection because of my love of all things Mid Century in my own home and if I hadn’t asked her what she was currently working on, we would have never met.

Do People Still Ask for Business Cards (Or Is It All About the Instagram Account)?

When I went to Alt Summit last year I was totally unprepared and didn’t have any business cards.

I didn’t think I’d need them.

And then everyone asked for one. I ended up writing out my info on little cards and apologizing for how wonky by “business cards” were.

And as a brand identity designer I should have showed up with the best cards in the bunch- instant marketing tool to show off our skills.

So even if you just make something quick and have them printed at Moo on the cheap, get yourself some business cards and make sure to put your social contact info because that’s where people will go first.

Yes, people will want to follow you on social, but they’re still asking for business cards.

And if you want to show people you really mean business, skip the cheap Moo cards and get something special- premium paper, premium finishing and printing, the works. It will set you apart and the more you make your business cards the Wonka Golden Ticket of business cards, the less likely someone will throw it away.

But be prepared- premium business cards may take up to one to two months to print and ship (We suggest Studio on Fire). But if you’re in a pinch, Moo offers a super fast turn-around.

While most of my networking at conferences for introverts tips involves talking to people, a beautifully designed business card that’s different than the rest will help you be memorable without having to be loud.

Brand Awareness Without Peopling (The Easiest Networking at Conferences for Introverts Tips)

Last year at Alt I noticed that there were these tables with all kinds of marketing materials left by attendees.

While they were mainly business cards, I had a thought.

What if we designed a leave-behind for our business promoting not our services but a freebie to help grow our email list? 

A marketing leave-behind is an easy way to promote your brand without having to talk to anyone at all.

The trick is, make sure the conferences you’re going to have that sort of thing, but if they don’t know you can turn your marketing leave-behind into an even more powerful business card as long as there is a strong call to action.

It can be a discount code, a free download, and complimentary drink the next time someone stops by your bar, whatever you can give away that provides value and makes you memorable.

Postcard size will stand out in a table of business cards, as will bold colors and strong design. Use one side to promote your freebie and the other with your business information.

Networking at Conferences for Introverts Conclusion: Allowing for Space (Because Conferences Are An Energy Drain)

Above all else, you need to protect your energy.

You need to remember that you are in charge of your conference-going experience.

If you just aren’t feeling like going to the after party, don’t go to the after party.

If you need to get up and get some air, get up and get some air.

If you need to take a break in the middle of the day, take a break.

Even if you’re at a conference that involves a certification, you can find ways to make space for yourself.

When I was at my StoryBrand certification, it was required that I show up to all sessions. But on the last day, just as Donald Miller was presenting, I felt horribly sick. Stress sick from a combination of tapped-out energy and travel anxiety. So I took a quick five minute escape. It was all I needed. I wasn’t going to ignore my body’s need for some space and fresh air. 

Listen to what your body needs and don’t worry if you become a party pooper.

Just don’t use the excuse for space make you skip the whole thing.